"Things I am Looking For in a Man"

This morning, as with most mornings after I put up a post, I started my day with some toast and a quick look at my blog's stats.

Traffic has been a bit down lately after peaking at 10,000+ hits in September.  The usual suspects are generating a lot of hits for our blog as being linked on PPP and the Globe and Mail are by far the best traffic sources a Leafs blog could ask for.

Having seen results that weren't terribly unexpected, I was presented with something that was at once shocking and amusing.  Someone, somehow, ended up at our blog by google searching "things I am looking for in a man".

While this may seem initially surprising, it is less so when you dig a little deeper.  With a post titled "Man Crush" and several others expressing infatuation with various members of the Leafs' team it's a bit less surprising.  Oh, and then there's this.  Suffice to say, it isn't all that shocking.

Now, after the longest lede in the history of blogging, I've decided to make a post on what I'm looking for in a man.  Don't worry, it's strictly platonic.

Things I am looking for in a forward:
"Tall, dark and handsome" is the usual line.  I'll settle for tall.  The Leafs are simply too small up front and while there is no shortage of problems with the forwards, this might be the (pardon the pun) biggest of them.  At 6'1" and 183 lbs, Nikolai Kulemin is our biggest top six forward.  To put this in context for those who know me, I am roughly 183 lbs.

6'4" with soft hands would go a long way towards addressing the Leafs' problems up front and also sounds like the beginnings of a man that the women of the Barilkosphere could turn into a fan favorite.

Things I am looking for in a defenseman:
Young, fit and assertive.  In other words, if they could all be a little more like Luke Schenn, the world would be a better place.  This comment doesn't speak to a need the team has so much as it serves to praise the play of our franchise defenseman.  Schenn has been incredible this year and is undoubtedly the team's MVP up to this point in the season.

Schenn's offseason commitment to fitness is something that both Leaf fans and potential suitors can get excited about.

Things I am looking for in a goalie:
Steady and reliable.  These are two things that we've been fortunate enough to have this season from J.S. Giguere.  I really can't complain about our goaltending to date.  While Giguere has rarely stolen a game for the Leafs thus far, he has made the saves he ought to make and has often made the big save when it was needed, which is much more than we've seen from our goaltending in recent years.

While some might want exciting and dynamic, I'm more into the kind of goalie I can rely on.

Things I am looking for in a coach:
Smart and measured.  Ron Wilson is smart but he could stand to work on the 'measured' bit.  While to some extent I can appreciate his candor, I often find myself wondering why he says some of the things he does.  After reliably putting  together some of the best penalty killing teams in the NHL prior to his arrival in Toronto, he's been unable to get anywhere close to that since becoming coach of the Buds.  I'll concede his intelligence but would like to see him put it into practice with the Leafs' special teams.

Ron's got the brains, but I'd like to see a coach that chooses his battles a bit better and only starts fights where some kind of resolution is possible.

The wrap up
These are the qualities that we at BCP are looking for.  A tall, young, fit and assertive guy that is both steady and reliable.  We're looking for someone smart and considered and who knows when to pick a fight and when to keep their displeasure to themselves (or at least to not air out the dirty laundry in public).

I'd like to close this post by wishing Mr or Ms "Things I am Looking For in a Man" the best of luck in their search.  I hope you found what you were looking for here at BCP, and if not, I hope you'll come back to read this post for a little bit of guidance.

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